I Lift Up My Eyes To The Hills

I wrote this post because it was stuck in my head. I had no idea what it looked like until it came out of my fingers. Please don't mistake it for my testimony or some extreme trial I've gone through recently; it is merely a simple picture of the unnecessary journey so many of us go through before we find Christ's love, or even after we've found it and decided to stray.

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I am running. Running, and running, and running. The intense kind of running. Faster than a sprint, but longer than a marathon. For years, I've been running. The ground I cover begins to look familiar, and I wonder if I've been here before.

I am running from myself. From everything I've ever done and ever will do that constantly separates me from joy. If I keep running, maybe I'll find it. Joy. Maybe I can outrun my past and find a whole new world. I think I'm strong enough to do it. But my actions keep chasing me, and they're gaining on me. I don't know what to do.

I'm drowning. Drowning in a sea of evil. Lies, hate, lust, envy...they consume me and begin to swallow me. I am about to die.

Someone, standing on the shore, is watching me. "HELP," I scream. She shakes her head sympathetically. She's been her before, but she can't help. She points to something I've never seen before.

All my life, I have been running in circles around a hill. I have never stopped to look to the top of the hill, at what's been there all along. This girl points her finger, and I look to the top of the hill.

I fling away the suffocating waters and desperately run up the hill. The climb is surprisingly easy; nothing compared to the run I've endured. At the top of the hill, at the foot of the cross, I find the best thing I possibly could have found. Open arms. I am rescued. I am treasured. I am loved.

I weep tears of exhaustion, then turn to tears of joy. I have found my home. I will never leave the foot of the cross.

I lift up my eyes to the hills-- where does my help come from? My help comes from the LORD, the Maker of heaven and earth. He will not let your foot slip-- he who watches over you will not slumber; indeed, he who watches over Israel will neither slumber nor sleep. The LORD watches over you-- the LORD is your shade at your right hand; the sun will not harm you by day, nor the moon by night. The LORD will keep you from all harm-- he will watch over your life; the LORD will watch over your coming and going both now and forevermore.

Psalm 121

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You Save Us From Our Prayers

This morning, I heard a song called "Devastation and Reform," by Relient K. My favorite line in the song says, "You save me from my prayers." I think it earned its place as my favorite because every time I hear it, I can't stop thinking about it! Not saving us through our prayers, or saying yes to our prayers. Saving us from our prayers. Doesn't that just blow your mind?? Maybe I'm the only one, but the idea persists in mesmerizing me.

I think it shows an example of how the Son's sacrifice truly saves us from ourselves more than from some outside evil. Yes, I believe in Satan and his demons. But I don't believe they forced us into our desperate need for a Savior. Christ saved us, first and foremost, from our own sins. However, even after that sacrifice has covered our eternal salvation, He must continue to save us, on a daily basis, from our own prayers. Because we pray for things that we don't need! Not only that; we pray for things that would harm us. We pray for sunshine, and God saves us from drought. We ask for rain, and He saves us from flood. We pray for a better job, but God saves us from a bad situation there that we're unaware of. Or He saves us from missing the ministry opportunity sitting right in front at our nose at our current, lower-paying job. We pray for a relationship, and He saves us from heartbreak or mistreatment.

I'm not trying to make us out like mindless puppets who don't know what we want or need. I'm also not saying that we shouldn't ask for things. We absolutely should! We only need to remember that when we don't receive all of our requests, we are not being abandoned or punished for something. (Another line in the song: "I have mot been abandoned, no, I have mot been deserted and I have not been forgotten.") The simple fact remains that we have in mind only the moment; God has all of eternity. He created us and therefore knows us infinitely better than we could ever know ourselves. The fact that we ask for things we shouldn't receive is exactly as it should be; after all, we are His children. But remember to continue to thank Him for saving us from our prayers.

Also, I typed this whole thing on my iPod Touch. Who da boss?!